Perimenopause Decoded: How to Balance Hormones and Feel Like Yourself Again
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Tafiq Akhir aka Mr. Menopause: . [00:00:00] Perimenopause is not just a phase, it's a whole body transition that can begin years before most women even know what's happening. And you might wake up one morning just feeling off, not sick, but just different. Your moods change unpredictably, your energy drops, your sleep doesn't come easy.
Your jeans even feel tighter, even though you haven't changed your diet and you ask for answers. But too often you hear things like, that's just getting older or it's just the part of menopause. Sound familiar? Well, here's the truth. For many women, those changes are not random, and they're not only about aging, they're part of a natural hormonal shift called perimenopause.
I'm Tafiq Akhir, also known as Mr. Menopause, a certified and award-winning menopause educator and strategist. I've been helping women overcome their midlife hormone health and weight management challenges for over two decades, and today I am going to make this. Simple. I'll be talking [00:01:00] about the signs, explaining the changes, and most importantly, giving you what you can do now to feel better and to take back control with confidence and clarity.
Because you deserve to feel seen. You deserve honest answers, and you deserve a plan that respects your body and your autonomy. And this episode is all about the first stage of menopause. Welcome to the Mr. Menopause Show.
Let's start with what perimenopause actually is. It's not menopause itself, it's the transition that leads up to it, the bridge between your reproductive years and menopause itself. Now, here's something that most people don't realize. Perimenopause can begin in the mid thirties for some women and for others it just shows up later in the forties.
But these shifts can begin many years before your final period. You wanna think of it like your body is whispering before it speaks more loudly, right? And it's not a breakdown, [00:02:00] it's a change in the operating system. And during this time, estrogen and progesterone levels will they begin to fluctuate in random new patterns.
One month, you may feel fine. The next month your body changes the plan without any notice, your period may change. It may be shorter, it may be longer. It may be heavier, it may be lighter. You may also notice brain fog, irritability, bloating, sleep problems, or anxiety that was never there before. And if it feels like your hormones threw a surprise party that you didn't agree to,
well, you're not wrong. Your body is sending signals. Your body is asking for a new kind of care.
Now let's keep the science simple. I want you to picture your hormones like an orchestra. When the instruments are in tune, life feels smooth and harmonious. When one section goes off the beat, well, this whole song feels different, right? Estrogen and progesterone. Well, their lead in. There's another [00:03:00] player though that we need to talk about called cortisol, and it is your main stress hormone.
And when stress stays high or sleep runs low, or even when meals are skipped, cortisol levels rise high. Cortisol levels can also push other hormones out of balance, and that's why stress care is not a luxury. Stress care is hormone care, and there is more. Estrogen supports your brain chemistry as well.
So when estrogen levels drop, your mood swings sporadically. Anxiety can climb, focus can fade, and then progesterone also helps you feel calm and helps you sleep. So when it fails, calm is harder to find. And three in the morning becomes your new wake up time, right? And this is not about mindset alone. This is chemistry. Look, you're not making it up because when estrogen and progesterone levels shift your metabolism well, it also changes. Your body may store more fat around your [00:04:00] midsection, and that is not a willpower thing.
That is biology. Doing what biology does.
Now let's name the symptoms that most people don't even connect to perimenopause, because look, recognition brings relief. Hot flashes get most of the attention, but there is more joint aches, stiffness, brain fog, forgetfulness, heart flutters, digestive changes, skin problems, hair shedding. Look, if it feels like everything is changing at once. At once. It's because everything is connected. The emotional side matters just as much. See, many women tell me that they don't feel like themselves anymore. They feel less patient, less confident, like their sparkle went dim. See, when Sylvia was 45, she ate well, exercise, had a big career that she loved, and then she started forgetting words in meetings.
She'd sit in her car crying for no reason. Her heart would raise at [00:05:00] night and just like you. Her doctor wrote it off as simply stress. Well, I showed her what to focus on and how to track her symptoms, and very quickly we saw a pattern. She was actually in perimenopause, and once she understood that the fear dropped.
She made minor changes including adjusting her food time, incorporating strength training workouts, adopting better sleep habits, and practicing breathing exercises when she felt stressed. Two months later, she told me I feel like myself again. Only wiser. See, awareness opens the door, small steps, keeps that door open.
You're not crazy, you're not weak, and you're definitely not alone. Look, perimenopause does not erase who you are. It shows you what your body needs next.
And now we turn awareness into action. And look, this is the heart of today's lesson, and I call it [00:06:00] the five Foundations of Hormone harmony. Because during perimenopause, what your hormones are actively moving, and these five foundations calm the chaos and bring your body back towards balance. They're not fads or quick fixes.
They are actually steady practices that work. In the Real World Foundation, one is nutrition. Food is leverage. Food is information. Food tells your hormones what to do. You wanna start by centering on protein at every meal. Eggs, fish, chicken, tofu beans, lentils, protein steadies, blood sugar. When blood sugar swings, that means your cortisol swings When cortisol swings, estrogen and progesterone struggle.
Add fiber rich foods like vegetables, fruits, legumes, and whole grains. Fiber helps your body remove extra estrogen and feeds good gut bacteria. Both are vital for hormone balance. You wanna choose healthy dietary fats [00:07:00] like avocado, olives, nuts, and seeds. Your body needs fat to make hormones and to support your brain health. Reduce added sugars and highly processed foods, and that does not mean forever.
It means less often and in smaller amounts because sugar spikes insulin and invites fat storage around your midsection. Drink more water than you think you need because hydration helps to regulate body temperature and cravings. In fact, picture your plate, half colorful vegetables, one quarter lean protein, one quarter small carbs, plus a thumb worth of healthy fat.
That one balance plate supports hormones, mood and energy all at the same time. Foundation two is movement. Movement is medicine. It lowers cortisol levels, boost your mood support. Sleep, protects muscles and bones and stabilizes blood sugar. Think strength first. Strength training two or three times per week keeps your [00:08:00] metabolism active and your body capable.
Add movement pieces in your day as well. A 20 minute walk, a quick dance break or a stretch session. little burst of movement, clear brain fog and lower stress also include flexibility and balance like yoga, Pilates, or bedtime stretches., you don't need punishing workouts. You need consistent, joyful movement that you actually enjoy. Foundation three, stress management.
Chronic stress is gasoline on the hormonal fire. It keeps cortisol levels high, it disrupts sleep and can exacerbate hot flashes. You need daily calm, and you can try my go-to relaxation technique, which I call the four step breathing. You inhale for four steps and you exhale with a big sigh.
Inhale. Exhale. You do that five times and when you do, [00:09:00] it tells your body and your nervous system that it's safe. Your heart rate settles, your hormone starts to listen and try a slow evening walk as well. Morning sunlight is also great. Even five minutes of gratitude, journaling can help. If that's your thing,
see less cortisol means estrogen and progesterone can do their jobs, and most importantly, rest is productive
foundation Four, sleep. Sleep is hormone repair time. It's when your brain resets and your body recovers. Perimenopause can make sleep tricky because of night sweats, racing thoughts and restlessness. So you wanna stack the deck in your favor. You want to do it by creating a bedtime ritual. Dim the lights, put the phone away. Keep your room cool and dark. Avoid caffeine, afternoon and heavy meals late at night.
If you wake up, don't panic. Place the hand on your belly. Breathe in slowly and exhale. [00:10:00] Remind your body that it's safe to rest again. Because a regular bedtime along with a regular wake time, while that creates a harmonious rhythm and rhythm, brings restoration. Foundation, five Mindset and self-Advocacy.
Perimenopause asks you to update how care for yourself. That can feel like a lot, especially if you feel less confident or wonder where your spark is or if it's gone forever, but your worth does not change with your hormones, you are still strong, you are still capable, and you are still wise. And this season of life invites you to be better friends with your body.
Say no when you need to. Set boundaries. Ask for help when you need it as well, because this is a time in your life to truly be selfish and to take care of you.
You don't have to do it all to be enough, and even at the doctor's office, you need to advocate for yourself. In fact, I believe this is the most [00:11:00] important place for you to advocate for yourself. So bring notes, track your symptoms, ask about options. If you feel dismissed, then you need to choose another doctor.
Plain and simple, menopause impacts your long-term health and vitality. So you want someone who knows their stuff, who cares,
and even better if they have access to proven resources or additional support that can help build your circle, connect with women and men who understand support is medicine too. You are not losing your spark. You are learning how to protect it.
Now let's get practical with my seven day starter plan. It's not perfect, but it's a powerful way to start because it's doable. Day one, add protein to breakfast,
eggs with spinach, Greek yogurt with berries, a tofu scramble. And then notice how your energy changes. Day two. Walk for 20 minutes outdoors. And if you already walk, add another five minutes. Just make sure [00:12:00] while you're outside, you're breathing deeply. Day three is a strength session. 10 squats, 10 wall pushups, 10 sit-ups, 10 rows with bands, and you repeat that twice. Day four is the evening. Wind down, dim the lights, put the phone away, stretch. Breathe in for four counts and exhale. Day five, add two extra cups of vegetables because color feeds your cells and supports your hormone balance.
So make those vegetables colorful and plentiful.
Day six, at a calm practice. Five minutes of breathing. Notice your shoulders soften and your thoughts slow down. And day seven reflect what helped you most this week. What will you continue doing? I always say that small steps. Make big changes. Now I'd like to share two brief stories that I think may help to bring this to better life for you.
And first is Denise age, 50 night [00:13:00] sweats, brain fog, and even afternoon energy crashes. She tried longer cardio and fewer calories, but only felt worse, so we added protein at breakfast. We swapped two cardio days for short strength workouts and added five minutes of breathing before bed. Three weeks later, her night, sweat eased.
Five weeks later, her energy returned. Eight weeks later, she felt strong and confident. Again, same woman, new plan, different results.
The second story is about Carla, age 47. She told me, I used to think I was losing control of my body. Her anxiety would spiked before meetings, and she would just wake up drenched at three in the morning every night. Now we work together to simplify her routine with protein at breakfast, mindful breathing twice a day, and a consistent sleep schedule within.
Four weeks, she noticed fewer night sweats and steadier moods. By week eight, she said, I finally feel like I'm [00:14:00] steering the ship again. That is what awareness and small steady change can do. They return control back to you and look, I can't forget to share the one that I hear most often walking into a room and forgetting why. Now you laugh it off until it happens in the meeting and you think, what's wrong with me? And here's the truth, your brain is not broken, but it is busy.
Estrogen supports memory pathways as well, so when it dips, you need more control, not more self blame. Food rhythm, sleep care, stress care movement. These habits help your brain fire clearly again. Okay. Now here's a few perimenopause myths that I'd like to clear up as well. Myth number one is that perimenopause starts only after your period stops.
That's false. The truth is that it can begin years before the last period. Myth two is that menopause related weight gain is about willpower. Absolutely not. [00:15:00] Menopause shifts change how your body stores energy. It's biology, not willpower. Myth three is that you just have to push through. Once again, not true.
You can learn, support and thrive through menopause. Look good care includes discussing your options with a qualified provider, and that includes both hormonal and non-hormonal options because good care is personal and respectful. I always say education first. Advocacy always. And when challenging moments hit say these three lines to yourself.
My body is wise. My needs are valid and I'm capable of doing the right next thing. And look, if you're tired of guessing, if your symptoms are menopause. And if you're ready to learn where you are in this journey, I invite you to take my complimentary Menopause clarity [email protected]. Now the quiz helps you to connect [00:16:00] symptoms to your stage and discover what support fits you best.
Your responses will also share whether you qualify for the Menopause Made Simple Experience, and that is my signature Menopause class. It's the foundational education resource that helps you understand what's happening, what your options are, and how to create a plan that respects you, your goals and your needs.
Perimenopause is not the beginning of the end. It's your body asking for a new kind of care. And when you give it that care, you don't just survive this stage of life, you thrive through it with wisdom and self-respect. Now I hope you got value from today's lesson, and if you did, be sure to subscribe and click the bell for more support on menopause and healthy aging.
Be sure to tune in next week when I'll be covering the other end of the three stages of menopause, which is post menopause. I'm Mr. Menopause, [00:17:00] your guiding ally here to walk this journey with you every step of the way. And until next time, stay safe and be well.
