Why I Wrote a Book About 80 Menopause Symptoms (And Why I'm Launching It on My Mother's 84th Birthday)
I found my mother standing at an open window in the middle of a Cleveland snowstorm.
It was freezing outside. Snow was blowing into the house. And she was standing there in her nightgown, desperate to cool down.
She was having a hot flash.
I was just a teenager. I didn't understand what was happening. All I knew was that my mother was suffering, and neither of us knew what to do about it.
That moment changed everything for me. It planted a seed that would grow into over 20 years of specialization in women's health and eventually lead to my career as a menopause educator.
But here's what makes me angry: My mother suffered for years without anyone telling her what was really happening to her body.
She had hot flashes. She had night sweats. She developed osteoporosis. Her blood pressure went up. She had headaches. She struggled emotionally.
No one ever told her these were all connected. No one ever explained that declining estrogen affects virtually every system in the body. No one gave her a comprehensive resource that explained what was happening and what she could do about it.
She deserved better.
And so do you.
The Problem We're Not Talking About
Here's what I've learned after working with hundreds of women going through menopause:
Most women are experiencing 15 to 20 symptoms and have no idea they're all connected to one hormonal transition.
They think they're developing separate diseases. They go from doctor to doctor, getting treated for individual symptoms without anyone connecting the dots. They're told "it's just stress" or "you're just getting older" or "that's normal, just deal with it."
The average woman experiences menopause for 7 to 10 years. That's a decade of potentially suffering without adequate information or support.
This isn't acceptable.
Women are going through one of the most significant biological transitions of their lives with less comprehensive information than they'd get about a common cold.
Why Current Resources Fall Short
When I started educating women about menopause, I looked for resources I could recommend. Books. Websites. Programs. Anything that would give women the comprehensive information they deserved.
Here's what I found:
Most menopause resources focus on the "big 3" symptoms: hot flashes, night sweats, and irregular periods. Some might mention 10 or 15 symptoms if you're lucky.
But menopause involves up to 80 recognized symptoms. Eighty.
And when women experience symptoms beyond the basics (things like voice changes, frozen shoulder, electric shock sensations, or panic attacks) they often have no idea these are connected to menopause.
They think they're losing their minds. They think they're falling apart. They think they're the only ones experiencing this.
They're not.
What's Different About This Book
"Decoding the 80 Symptoms and Side Effects of Menopause" is the comprehensive resource I wish I could have given my mother.
The symptoms are organized into three main categories: physical symptoms, cognitive and memory symptoms, and emotional symptoms. Within each category, every single symptom gets full treatment. Not a paragraph. Not a bullet point. A complete breakdown that explains why it's happening (the actual biological mechanism in language you can understand), your first steps (three practical actions that have helped many women), what else helps (additional strategies, supplements, lifestyle modifications), and when to seek medical help (clear guidance on when self-care isn't enough).
This isn't a book that tells you to "just do yoga and drink more water." This is a comprehensive guide that respects your intelligence and gives you real information you can act on.
It includes stories from real women I've worked with. Women like Maria, who went from hot flashes every 30 minutes to having none at all. Women like Heidi, whose brain fog was so severe she thought something was seriously wrong. Women like Deanna, whose anxiety was overwhelming until she understood what was happening.
These women aren't broken. They were just missing information.
Why January 12th Matters
January 12, 2026 would have been my mother's 84th birthday.
I can't give her this book. I can't go back and ease her suffering. I can't undo the years she spent confused and unsupported.
But I can honor her memory by making sure other women have the resource she never did.
That's why I'm launching "Decoding the 80 Symptoms" on her birthday.
This book is my tribute to her. It's the comprehensive guide she deserved. It's the resource that connects all the dots, explains what's happening, and gives women the power to advocate for themselves and manage this transition with confidence.
The Bigger Mission
This book is about more than just symptom management.
It's about breaking the silence that surrounds menopause. It's about giving women the language to describe what they're experiencing. It's about connecting the dots so women stop thinking they have 20 different problems when they actually have one hormonal transition affecting multiple systems.
When you know better, you can do better, and you can live better.
That's been my guiding principle throughout my career in menopause education. And it's what this book is designed to do: give you the knowledge you need to take action.
Because here's what I've seen over and over: When women understand what's happening in their bodies, everything changes.
They stop blaming themselves. They stop thinking they're broken. They start advocating for the care they deserve. They implement strategies that actually work. They find relief.
And they stop suffering in silence.
The Takeaway I Hope to Inspire
If there's one thing I want you to take away from this article, it's this:
You are not broken. You are not falling apart. You are not experiencing 20 different diseases.
You're experiencing menopause, and every single symptom you're dealing with is connected to one hormonal transition. When you understand that connection, when you see how declining estrogen affects virtually every system in your body, everything starts to make sense.
My mother suffered in silence because she didn't have this information. She thought each symptom was a separate problem. She didn't know that the headaches, the bone loss, the mood changes, and the hot flashes were all part of the same transition.
But you do know. Or you will once you have the right resource.
That's what this book is about. Not just listing symptoms, but connecting the dots. Giving you the biological understanding, the practical strategies, and the confidence to advocate for yourself.
Because when you understand what's happening in your body, you can take effective action. And when you take effective action, you can live well through menopause and beyond.
When you know better, you can do better, and you can live better.
That's the takeaway I hope to inspire. And that's why I wrote this book.
What Happens Next
If you're experiencing menopause symptoms (whether it's 3 symptoms or 30) this book is for you.
If you know someone going through menopause who's struggling, this book is the gift they need.
If you're a healthcare provider who wants a comprehensive resource to recommend to patients, this book gives them everything in one place.
"Decoding the 80 Symptoms and Side Effects of Menopause" launches Monday, January 12th.
My mother stood at that window suffering without answers. Without support. Without the comprehensive information she deserved.
You don't have to.
This is the resource she never had. And it's the resource I want every woman navigating menopause to have.
Because no woman should suffer through this transition in silence the way my mother did.
Let's change that. Together.
About Tafiq Akhir
Tafiq Akhir, known professionally as Mr. Menopause, is a certified menopause and healthy aging strategist, host of The Mr. Menopause Show podcast, and Menopause Specialist of the Year 2024. For over 20 years, he's been dedicated to ensuring women have the menopause education and support his mother never received.
Related Resources:
[Link to your free Menopause Clarity Check-In]
[Link to Menopause Made Simple Masterclass]
[Link to The Mr. Menopause Show podcast]
